Last fall we had a series of "Life Sentences". We looked at 18 characters from the Bible and what kind of "Life Sentence" summed up their lives. What did you think of first when you heard their name. What is my life sentence? When I leave this life on earth, what will people say? Will they say I lived a good life? Will they say I lived a selfish life? And although it's not what others think of me and what God sees in me... I still want my "Life Sentence" to reflect HIM!
These last few days have been a roller coaster of emotions. Even though it wasn't my father that passed this time, it was my wife's father. Several emotions that I went through were anger, sadness, confusion, helpless, happy, relieved and other emotions related to those. Those who read my blog and know the relationship that her and her father had will understand the happiness and being relieved. The anger was in part to it was the day before our Anniversary and "that man" had screwed up something else that was beautiful in our lives. He messed up a day of celebration. What a "JERK". I know that doesn't sound like something I should say and how hateful those words are. But it just reminded me of the man he was. If I was to summarize his life in a life sentence... it would have to be... "He never knew true joy because he chose to miss out on God, Life, and Family and wasted his life in misery." It's actually sad how miserable he was. Anyways... I don't know how he lived his final days. Maybe he made peace with God. Maybe he did ask Jesus to save him. I won't know until I pass this life. As much as I don't like the things he did, I don't know how he spent his final days. My hope is that when Michele tried to minister to him a few years ago, he took to heart what she said.
Of all the things that I have learned over the last several years have taught me that even when someone does us wrong and Jesus enters in they are never the same from that moment on. Even though we remember all the terrible things they did. We might have forgiven them but we have never forgotten. God's grace is so much better than that. God's grace not only forgives but He FORGETS our wrong. That is what we are to do. It's not easy. In fact for me I would say that is probably harder than "Loving my neighbor". It goes with the Pray for those who persecute you.
Matthew 5:44
But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you
And...
Romans 9:14
Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.
When I started this I had planned on going a different direction but as you can see it went where God needed me to be.
I don't know if I have ever forgave that man for doing the horrible things he did to Michele.
As I read more of Matthew.. this is what I found...
Matthew 5:43-48
43 "You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' 44 But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, 45 that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. 46 If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? 47 And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? 48 Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
As I reflect over the last few days... I am glad that I was able to be with Michele thru this. I hope that she finds closure thru all of this one way or another.
As I head to bed tonight... I have the words from Matthew to focus on. Change is hard but necessary!
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